Dysalexic

I’m so ready for high school to be over. I just realized today all the infantile bullshit that I put up with has finally gone away. Yet my brother is still dealing with it.

Here is what I have learned, and so will he: The pretty girls really aren’t that pretty. They wear too much makeup and spend too much money on clothes and their hair. They also aren’t that popular. They sleep around and trade boyfriends. No one respects them because they are undiginified and unintelligent.

The popular boys will amount to nothing. They act macho because of an overdose of testosterone and homosexual urges which they try to surpress. They are not attractive, despite their strutting. Their mouths are big in order to fit large penises. Their muscles are big because of excessive masturbation and steroids. Their lack of skill in anything besides sports (which they even suck at in comparison to professionals) will lead them to boring blue collar jobs. They listen to country and classic rock, grow their hair long and have horrible hygeine.  Why are they cool? Because the “popular girls” think so. In all reality it’s because they can get beer from their redneck fathers. They smoke too much pot. They drink too much beer. Some are already sporting beer bellies at the age of 16.

So, if you’re reading this and are pre-pubescent to a junior in high school, i’m here to tell you it’s going to be okay. The popular girls will get pregnant by the popular boys and have popular children who will also amount to nothing. They will live in this small town forever, and live their high school drama for the rest of their lives.

Grow up. Get out. Be something. Appreciate art, culture, and society.

As for those who followed in the footsteps of stereotypical popular kids, I’m sorry it ended up like this. I’m not here to offend, only to warn.